Loyal in your shadow

I HATE HIGHSCHOOLS

2009-11-04T04:28:29Z

Fill your life with assholes. As many as you can. That way, the blur is out of the pictures. You're having fun, and you honestly just don't give a fuck. Can't say you're mad, cause you don't care. It's a matter of being indifferent. Pretend as if everyone at every event, ever gig, is there to admire you. You love yourself. It's funny though, because at the same time you hate yourself. How about starting a sentence that doesn't begin and end with A-Z "YOU."

It's cool, I've been there.

isabelley @ 2009-11-03T15:22:00

2009-11-03T21:22:37Z

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.

I am so thankful to be alive

2009-11-03T03:59:25Z

I'm not hiding any shame, say it's all the same.
Since apparently, I'm a sixteen year old girl with an over the hill back, I'm started to do yoga to help stretch all the muscles to strengthen my spine. I cleaned my room, head to toe.
No worries, I spent the afternoon with my favorite person. Tonight is chinese take out and watch TV with dad night.

isabelley @ 2009-11-02T19:51:00

2009-11-03T02:05:01Z

People come and go, and that's something I learned to live with. But, while they are here to be a little part of me, I can do nothing but enjoy their presence as much as humanly possible. There will be bigger, there will be better. Consequently, for night now, I'm answering my own question.

isabelley @ 2009-10-24T17:49:00

2009-10-24T22:52:42Z

Nothing in my life is a constant anymore. Variable here, there, which basically results in a no-control zone. It feels okay for awhile, then it breaks again. I never know what to expect. I am on my toes, anxious for answers. I love you less, now that I know that you.

isabelley @ 2009-10-24T17:22:00

2009-10-24T22:22:38Z

And all together it went well
We made pretend we were best friends
Then she said oh youre a freak
They ordered me to make mistakes
Together again, like the beginnin
It all works somehow in the end
The things we did the thing you hide
But for the record its between you and I.

isabelley @ 2009-10-23T15:27:00

2009-10-23T20:27:50Z

It's cleaaaaaar, dear mother, bless you during this month. Love you, always.

Alcohol.

2009-10-23T09:30:06Z

I'm building a comfortable routine. I quit my job, which at the time felt like the right thing to do. Slaving over hours, never able to catch a fresh breath, and now here I am, rejuvenated; more alive even. I kinda miss it. Scratch that, I do miss it.

Cancer

October 2009. Your ruling planet is the moon. The full moon on the 4th is in Aries is in your 10th house. You’re more driven or active in your career. The new moon on the 18th is in Libra in your 4th house. You may find yourself wanting to spend more loving or social moments at home with family.

Mercury is in Virgo in your 3rd house until the 10th. It seems like communications have accelerated and you need a little peace and quiet. Between the 10th and the 28th Mercury will be in Libra in your 4th house. Your thoughts and conversations will be more loving towards family. After the 28th Mercury will be in Scorpio in your 5th house. Expect more intense or obsessive thoughts and conversations relating to the kids, your social life and investments.

Venus is in Virgo in your 3rd house until the 15th. You’ll find that you’ll be more charming in all your communications to get what you want. You may socialize more with siblings and neighbors during this time. After the 15th Venus will be in Libra in your 4th house. You certainly will enjoy more loving and social times at home or spending more money on home improvements.

Mars is in Cancer in your 1st house until the 17th. You’ll be more uncompromising and emotional that no one will want to confront you. After the 17th Mars will be in Leo in your 2nd house for the next 8 months due to the upcoming retrograde. Hopefully you have built up a strong financial nest in order to put out a lot more money during these 8 months.

Jupiter is in Aquarius in your 8th house. Benefits from inheritance or other people’s money such as loans or grants. More sex will be on the agenda.

Saturn is in Virgo in your 3rd house until the 30th. Plenty of serious communications will consume you now, so make sure you don’t get so serious that you get depressed. It will be hard for you to absorb what you read. After the 30th Saturn will be in Libra in your 4th house. Home and family will require more responsibility on your part.

Uranus is in Pisces in your 9th house. You may unexpectedly decide to travel, change your studies, beliefs or legal strategies.

Neptune is in Aquarius in your 8th house. You’re daydreaming about improving business/joint finances or about the joy of sex.

Pluto is in Capricorn in your 7th house. Major changes or more control issues will come up with your honey or the public.

2009 Forecast

Congratulations for surviving 2008. 2009 has its share of Mercury retrogrades this year plus a wonderful Venus will be retrograding in Aries this year, so expect old relationships to pop back into your life or money changes, hopefully for the better. 2 eclipses this year as usual with the first one in erratic Aquarius and the second in the very end of emotional Cancer.

Let’s start with the first Mercury which started in approach phase on December 26th of 2008. Mercury moves into Aquarius on January 1st, goes retrograde on January 11th, goes direct on February 1st and resolves finally on February 21st. Capricorns will enjoy the time Mercury spends in Capricorn, while Aquarius will benefit Mercury in their own sign. While in Capricorn the signs of Cancer, Libra and Aries will feel most challenged. Fellow earth signs of Virgo and Taurus will share the joy with Capricorn. While in Aquarius the signs of Leo, Scorpio and Taurus will feel most challenged by communication problems. Air signs of Libra and Gemini will share positive communications with Aquarius.

The second Mercury Retrograde will start the approach phase on April 23rd in Taurus, move into Gemini on May 1st, go retrograde on May 7th, go direct on May 31st and finally resolve on June 20th. While Mercury is in Taurus the signs of Scorpio, Leo and Aquarius will be challenged the most. Fellow earth signs Virgo and Capricorn will share the joy of communications with Taurus. While Mercury is in Gemini the signs Sagittarius, Virgo and Pisces will be challenged the most. Fellow air signs Libra and Aquarius will share the joy of communications with Gemini.

The third Mercury Retrograde will start the approach phase on August 18th in Virgo, move into Libra on August 26th, go retrograde on September 7th, go direct on September 30th and finally resolve on October 14th. While Mercury is in Virgo the fellow earth signs Taurus and Capricorn will share the joy of communications. The signs of Pisces, Gemini and Sagittarius will be most challenged by communications.

The last Mercury retrograde will start the approach phase in Capricorn on December 9th, go retrograde on December 27th and go direct mid January of 2010. Cancer, Libra and Aries will be most challenged during this retrograde. However, fellow earth signs Virgo and Taurus will share the joy of communications with Capricorn.

Bottom line is the fact that the earth signs enjoyment will prove beneficial to the economy. Since the retrograde is fluctuating between an earth sign and an air sign during the first 3 retrogrades it indicates the fluctuation of good and bad for the economy. The last Mercury retrograde in only Capricorn shows the economy stabilizing.

This year Venus is retrograding. The approach phase starts on February 2nd, moves into Pisces briefly on March 3rd, goes retrograde on March 7th, goes direct on April 18th and finally resolves on May 21st. For the main part of the retrograde while it is in Aries fellow fire signs of Sagittarius and Leo will benefit financially and romantically. Huzzah! That means a lot of hot passion the first half of this year. The signs that will be challenged financially or romantically will be Libra, Cancer and Capricorn. Oh well. For the brief time it’s in Pisces the fellow water signs Scorpio and Cancer will enjoy more love and money. If loved ones come back in your life at this time remember what caused the breakup in the first place before you put too much energy into the relationship.

Mars goes retrograde in Leo starting the approach phase in November, actually retrograding in January of 2010 and resolving in April. Leos will get the respect and attention they want. However, Aquarians will be challenged the most. Scorpios and Taurus will also be challenged in dramatic ways. Fellow fire signs of Sagittarius and Aries will reap positive attention and respect from others. In essence, it will be a very dramatic time for all. I fear the most obvious Aquarian at the moment; Barack Obama may lose something quite dear to him.

Finally, there are 2 eclipses this year as usual followed by a distracting minor eclipse the 2 weeks later. The first eclipse in January 26th has had its energy start kicking in since November 11, 2008. Aquarius will enjoy sudden new improvements. However, Leo, Scorpio and Taurus may feel the challenge of unexpected problems pop up during these 2 ½ months. The fellow air signs of Libra and Gemini will share the joy of Aquarius. The distracting full moon eclipse is February 9th is in Leo and will kick in right after the January 26th eclipse is over. Leos will enjoy a brief dramatic improvement during this time. However, Aquarius, Scorpio and Taurus will feel challenged during this time. The fellow fire signs of Sagittarius and Aries will share the joy of dramatic improvements with Leo.

The second eclipse on July 26th is the very end of Cancer and its energy will start kicking in May 11th. Cancer will enjoy the nurturing and positive experiences the most. Fellow water signs of Scorpio and Pisces will share the joy of nurturing and positive experiences with Cancer. Capricorn, Libra and Aries may feel challenged with overemotional moments. The distracting full moon eclipse in Aquarius will be on August 6th, but it started kicking in when the July 26th eclipse is over. Don’t let it side track all the positive experiences you had in the past 2 ½ months. Aquarius of course will enjoy the sudden improvements. However, Leo, Scorpio and Taurus may feel temporarily challenged during this time. The other air signs of Libra and Gemini may feel a temporary and sudden moment of improvements. It won’t last long, but see what you can change at this time to your advantage.

So, there you have it. 2009 will be a transition year of stability mixed with instability involving money and relationships. If you’re prepared you’ll handle 2009 with ease. Map out the challenging moments, talk to an astrologer if you’re feeling overwhelmed, but at the very least be prepared for the challenges. It will be a year of growth and positive change.

isabelley @ 2009-10-23T03:11:00

2009-10-23T08:11:49Z

On a ROLE.

2009-10-22T04:47:48Z

No. No. No.

2009-10-17T16:38:29Z

THE MORE I SEE, THE LESS I KNOW. THE MORE I LIKE TO LET IT GO.

isabelley @ 2009-10-14T23:35:00

2009-10-15T04:36:26Z

When I'm working for something, that's when I feel most accomplished; most satisfied, most relieved. And when you think there is nothing left to be done, just keep adding to the list, keep pushing, and I'll be okay.
My void will be filled. My debt will be payed. Each day is better. Sometimes it's hard to see, but I always come around and I'll never give up. NEVER EVER.

How time has changed.

2009-10-08T05:11:52Z

breast milk.

favorite underwear of all time

my bitch.

OPEN WIDE.

\

\

i don't really know what I was thinking.

crotch shot for ya

so deathly sick. worst virus.

malibu tattoosss

prepubescent b(.)(.)bs

\

nude.

cracked out

phone photos from 08

going to hammond listening to eminem cd's.

out of gas. third time that day with dalty.

shoppin in chicago

view from grant park

road trip!

before skinny dipping with snookie @ lake ramsey

rope swing

hair of the dog

the moon on my birthday

just turned 15, zoe's bathroom

wing eating contest @ hoooters

quincenerua

sage's bush(es) ate my legs

flat tire.

taco bell

christopher.

spending all my days with D.

You care. Right.

2009-10-04T17:19:00Z

How many special change, how many lives are living strange?

isabelley @ 2009-10-03T22:15:00

2009-10-04T03:30:14Z

I spent the night at Nan's new APT. uptown Friday night, while my friends went to the parish fair. We went out to Frenchmen, I got to see her knit tight gang including Veronica and Garrett; that was nice. I ate a burrito from the taco stand, saw my insane cousin after twelve years, and watched a performance by some local New Orleans band that played Neil Young covers. It was nice to be "away" from here. It makes me realize how my environment affects my moods. The general society, even. Some place that is so close to home, can feel so far away just through terms of diversity. I stuck around for awhile the next day, grabbed lunch at Liauzza's, and ran errands with my sister around the city.
I made her cry when I confessed the truth about my dislike for her choice in boys. Maybe I can't feel the way I do about him, but I'm not the one dating him. Like she says, she thinks of me as the older sister, and believes she is letting me down. There go, I felt like shit.

isabelley @ 2009-10-02T11:57:00

2009-10-02T17:03:02Z

My life has been at ease for the most part. I get to fuck around, and shuffle my roles, but I need a change. A change in a permanent pace.

Life has never felt so good

2009-09-25T03:50:32Z

I think I'm feeling fine for the first time in awhile. I'm stable, to say the least. No scary threats or thoughts, no cries for attention. I've got everything I need, and the most solid group of well-rounded friends I could ever ask for. I appreciate what I got, and look forward to every day as an expansion towards my goal. Slowly but surely, I'm checking more off the list, making my way to the top.

sweet

2009-09-24T00:53:10Z

Now

2009-09-21T22:49:33Z

I carry you in my back pocket. There, you bring me a sense of warmth, a conversation, a memory, or a mystery. I can rely on you.
"Why is it the closer I get to you, the more you try to push me away?"
Story of my life.

Seeing you today was DELIGHTFUL.

It is rediculous

2009-09-19T19:10:18Z

how used I am to getting what I want. The reason I'm fighting this, is because I'm not getting what I want. I usually suck up all the venom out of a relationship, until it is squash. But this time, I'm fighting that HE will put out given the circumstances. I've been so up lately, seeing through everyone that feels superior to me. Hey fuck you.
The whole world is spinning in my head.

Ironic.

2009-09-08T01:19:47Z

Everything I needed, nothing I wanted.

It took a lot of bad

2009-09-05T01:56:46Z

to realize what may seem like an ideal, just isn't as good as what you already have.

Literally

2009-09-03T23:36:46Z

You've got me nauctious.
I am at a turning point right now.
I am confused, and scared as all hell.
And at the same time, feel like it.
I am sinking.
My thought process is jammed.
Every thought I have is so fucking cynical, it brings me down, mentally and physically.
I don't want to progess in you.
I don't want progess in anything but myself.
It's important that I figure this delima out.

Expectations

2009-09-01T02:50:37Z

They are never what it seems to be. Surfaced, empty, insecure.
I didn't expect things to be quaint for us, but you're right, you make me fucking happy and that's all there is to it. You are something else, and I would be so happy to accompany you through whatever you need/want.

What

2009-08-27T22:58:25Z

I've been telling myself the past seven years of my life is that "You don't need anybody but yourself." Which I guess is somewhat true, but at the same time, COMPLETLY false. My intentions were heading the right way, but my motives weren't. Insteading of downing life and everything around me, my new plan, is to accept the good and bad in things, and appreciate what I got. It'll be all good with a nice, SINCERE attitude and an open mind.